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 Post subject: WICOE CLUB
PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 11:11 am 
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Joined: Tue Jan 09, 2007 5:46 pm
Posts: 6883
(Women In Charge Of Everything) Is proud to announce the opening of its

EVENING CLASSES FOR MEN! OPEN TO MEN ONLY & ALL ARE WELCOME

Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants

The course covers two days, and topics covered in this course include:

DAY ONE

HOW TO FILL ICE CUBE TRAYS = Step by step guide with slide presentation

TOILET ROLLS- DO THEY GROW ON THE HOLDERS? = Roundtable discussion

DIFFERENCES BETWEEN LAUNDRY BASKET & FLOOR = Practising with hamper (Pictures and graphics)

DISHES & SILVERWARE; = DO THEY LEVITATE/FLY TO KITCHEN SINK OR DISHWASHER BY THEMSELVES? = Debate among a panel of experts.

REMOTE CONTROL = Losing the remote control - Help line and support groups

LEARNING HOW TO FIND THINGS = Starting with looking in the right place Instead of turning the house upside down while screaming = Open forum

DAY TWO

EMPTY MILK CARTONS; DO THEY BELONG IN THE FRIDGE OR THE BIN? = Group discussion and role play

HEALTH WATCH; = BRINGING HER FLOWERS IS NOT HARMFUL TO YOUR HEALTH = PowerPoint presentation

REAL MEN ASK FOR DIRECTIONS WHEN LOST = Real life testimonial from the one man who did :lol:

IS IT GENETICALLY IMPOSSIBLE TO SIT QUIETLY AS SHE PARALLEL PARKS? = Driving simulation

LIVING WITH ADULTS; = BASIC DIFFERENCES BETWEEN YOUR MOTHER AND YOUR PARTNER = Online class and role playing

HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION = Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques

REMEMBERING IMPORTANT DATES & CALLING WHEN YOU'RE GOING TO BE LATE = Bring your calendar or PDA to class

GETTING OVER IT; = LEARNING HOW TO LIVE WITH BEING WRONG ALL THE TIME = Individual counsellors available :lol:

This is for all me girly frirnds who may need a laugh and to guys who you think can handle the truth! :wink: :lol:

ps Nearly forgot this one, when they turn the knob on to the washing machine and say to you "I have done the washing for YOU": Well girls I am in serious trouble, cause I most definately need new reading glasses, cause I have not seen any men walking around naked in otherwords they don't wear clothes, use bathtowels etc etc?
PLEASE DO FEEL FREE GIRLS TO ADD YOUR OWN COMMENT TO ENRICH THE COURSE. Ali :wink: :lol:

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As Winston said, even if you are a minority of one it does not make you wrong.1984 George Orwell


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 11:30 am 
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Location: North Wales
:lol: :lol: :lol:

Very good.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 12:45 pm 
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Posts: 1502
Location: Over the hill
Mrs OB saw the advertisement for this course & wanted me to sign up for it, I declined pointing out to her that if I passed the course she would no longer be able to partake in her favourite pleasure - nagging me.

Am I a considerate husband or what?

In fact I would like to pass on to my fellow man the following advice;

It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger.
When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's nothing worse than an oversensitive woman.
My name is Ron. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Julie. When I took "early retirement" last year, it became necessary for Julie to get a full-time job, both for extra income and for the health benefits that we needed.
Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age.
I usually get home from the golf course about the same time she gets home from work. Although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner.
I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating out is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home cooked grub when I hit that door.
She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.
Another symptom of ageing is complaining, I think. For example she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean).
I like to think tact is one of my strong points.
When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the lawn. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big, cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.
I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Julie. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy. Many men will find it difficult. Some will find it impossible!
Nobody knows better than I do how frustrating women get as they get older. However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your ageing wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile.
After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.....

_________________
Tip of the day - change all your passwords to incorrect, that way when you forget what it is your computer will tell you "your password is incorrect".


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 12:56 pm 
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Joined: Sat Dec 06, 2008 2:28 pm
Posts: 1166
Location: near Tomar
Hilarious OB! And I am sure Ali and I will happily visit you - when you get out of intensive care! :lol: :lol:

Good post Ali. The other one is when half-way round the supermarket and OH moans "haven't you finished yet?". I try to remind him that he likes to eat as well.

However he is very good at helping wipe up, etc. which would give OB a heart attack! But perhaps my whip is bigger than Mrs. OB's?? :wink:


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 3:48 pm 
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Joined: Thu May 27, 2010 12:06 pm
Posts: 393
Location: near Bombarral
I have finaly worked out how to get my OH to do those jobs that he keeps putting off..... I start doing them myself! The effect is amazing, he can't help but take over :lol:

An example....

Three and a half years ago OH was building a house just round the corner. When they started clearing the ground they found an old 'beehive' bread oven. As i've always wanted one he very thoughtfully brought it home in a wheelbarrow! A few weeks later when he had some spare time he most kindly built a platform for the oven to stand on. But that was as far as the project got....

In April of this year whilst walking my dogs I found some soil very rich in clay that would be perfect for packing round the oven. Next day without mentioing my plan I trundled off with my barrow to collect the clay. When OH saw what I doing he just told me that he was going to get around to finishing it! I explained that I had waited 3 years! See I'm quiet a patient girl :D

I spent 3 gloious days packing 4" wet clay round my oven. More of it on me I think! I looked like a mud wrestler :D

Well lo and behold the following week OH went to the builders merchant and came back armed with cement and lime. He finished the oven off lovely! Now why couldn't he have done that before :?:

So girls if you want a job done, start doing it yourself. It's got to worth a shot :idea:


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 4:02 pm 
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Location: Over the hill
Ronie wrote:
I have finaly worked out how to get my OH to do those jobs that he keeps putting off..... I start doing them myself! The effect is amazing, he can't help but take over :lol:

An example....

Three and a half years ago OH was building a house just round the corner. When they started clearing the ground they found an old 'beehive' bread oven. As i've always wanted one he very thoughtfully brought it home in a wheelbarrow! A few weeks later when he had some spare time he most kindly built a platform for the oven to stand on. But that was as far as the project got....

In April of this year whilst walking my dogs I found some soil very rich in clay that would be perfect for packing round the oven. Next day without mentioing my plan I trundled off with my barrow to collect the clay. When OH saw what I doing he just told me that he was going to get around to finishing it! I explained that I had waited 3 years! See I'm quiet a patient girl :D

I spent 3 gloious days packing 4" wet clay round my oven. More of it on me I think! I looked like a mud wrestler :D

Well lo and behold the following week OH went to the buildersmerchant and came back armed with cement and lime. He finished the oven off lovely! Now why couldn't he have done that before :?:

So girls if you want a job done, start doing it yourself. It's got to worth a shot :idea:



Now isn’t that is just typical of women, they’re quite capable of doing the job themselves but no, they’d rather nag us blokes to do it for them. :lol:

_________________
Tip of the day - change all your passwords to incorrect, that way when you forget what it is your computer will tell you "your password is incorrect".


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 6:23 pm 
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Location: near Bombarral
I don't nag OB! Just make small hints every few months or so....

But what is typical of my man ( I won't say all men :) ) is that we women can never do it right! So my man (I won't say all men :) ) have to do a better job :roll: :lol:


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jul 15, 2010 9:11 pm 
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I just do this
http://xspblog.com/wp-content/uploads/2 ... -boots.jpg

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They are not hot flushes,
They are power surges.


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jul 16, 2010 8:28 am 
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Joined: Thu Dec 04, 2008 1:06 pm
Posts: 1502
Location: Over the hill
Ronie wrote:
I don't nag OB! Just make small hints every few months or so....


Far be it from me to lecture you Ronie, but subtle hints don’t work on the male of the species. The problem is that whilst both sexes can understand the written word, the same doesn’t apply to the spoken word. Men only listen for key words which usually are connected with food, drink, sport or sex. To illustrate my point I give you the following example of a conversation between Mrs OB and myself where she tried to use subtlety;

Mrs OB said:
"This place is a mess! C'mon,
You and I need to clean up.
Your stuff is lying on the floor,
and if we don't do laundry right now
you'll have no clothes to wear."

What I actually heard was:
blah, blah, blah, blah, C'MON
blah, blah, blah, YOU AND I
blah, blah, ON THE FLOOR
blah, blah, blah, RIGHT NOW
blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, NO CLOTHES.

Realising her error she then said something which included words from the key categories; blah, blah, KICK, blah, blah, F###ING, blah blah, BALLS.

theantikid wrote:


That is blackmail!

P.S. – your signature line is incorrect, Mrs OB always allows me to have the last words in any argument (provided it’s “yes dear”).

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Tip of the day - change all your passwords to incorrect, that way when you forget what it is your computer will tell you "your password is incorrect".


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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Jul 16, 2010 10:19 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 27, 2006 2:59 pm
Posts: 1097
Location: Portugal
Ali: I really couldn't waste my time attending your advertised evening classes. Much to busy mowing the grass, washing the car & filling it with petrol (can't think of anything else yet!!) Oh and who would be so daft as to learn how to fill ice trays when you can go to Pingo Doce and by a bag of ice for €1.. :lol: :wink:


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